Acceptance. Different, Not Less.

I think the hardest part about finally getting a diagnosis is how many people pull out of your child's life, like they've done something wrong or they aren't good enough. That's what breaks my heart the most. When friends stop showing up and start disappearing because your child is different and they just don't know how to handle that. Instead of disappearing because of the unknown, ask questions, get to know how he is different, what he likes, what his personality is like; and accept that he is different, not less. 

It's also hard when people tell you they are sorry. Sorry for what? I really don't get that. There's nothing to be sorry for. My child is different and that is perfectly ok because he is truly an amazing human. Please don't ever tell me you're sorry that my child has autism. I don't need sympathy; he needs acceptance.

This journey is beautiful when you begin to unravel who your child is underneath all of the layers of labels that society puts on them. And it's hard for other people to accept that he is still a person, not a diagnosis. He is not autistic, he has autism. His diagnosis does not define him. 

So, I am partially grateful for those who can't see beneath the layers and accept that my child is different, not less. Because those are the people who open my eyes to the amazing friends and family we do have that are nothing but loving, supportive, and include our son in their lives because they see the amazing little boy that he is. And that's what fills my heart; acceptance.  

Bennett Is Going To School!

Today, Cody and I went up to the school that Bennett will be attending this fall for orientation. He will be in an Early Childhood Special Education classroom; so we got to see his classroom and meet his teacher, Miss Katie. She was very nice and I think she will be a great fit with Bennett. He will be going 5 days a week for half days! I seriously can't believe our baby is going to school! It will be so good for him though, so we are very excited. It didn't really hit me until I saw his name on the little birthday chart his teacher had hanging on the wall. Haha! We have to return registration paperwork and schedule his IEP and evaluation and then he can start as soon as he turns 3 in October!

Insurance Isn't Easy

Well, after taking to someone the other day that didn't know what they were talking about, I finally got some answers today. Apparently, our current health insurance will not cover services for autism. We can't get an evaluation or anything. The Affordable Care Act requires insurances companies to acknowledge autism and pay for services.. Unless it's a self-funded plan. Which, of course, is what we have. I have the option of two other plans but one is self-funded (again) and the other doesn't cover habilitation services. So I'm going to try talking to HR at my job this week to see what's up with that.

In the mean time, we applied for Medicaid and now have to wait for that. I'm assuming we will be denied because we already have health insurance; and then we will have to appeal it and hope it doesn't take too long to go through. But we won't go down with a fight! We got this! 

Here Begins Our ASD Journey

I am just finally processing and accepting this all. It's been very hard to talk about and a very sensitive topic for me. Watching other people's children pass Bennett in developments was and still is hard. But I am doing much better with it than I was the last few months. I have accepted that Bennett is just different, but still the same amazing little boy we have had all along. So I am finally ready to open up about all we have been dealing with and share our story and adventure as we move forward.

We started speech for Bennett 6 months ago because he had a very evident speech delay. Our Dr told us to just be patient and that he would eventually talk; but he wasn't making progress. So we reached out to Early On and (in a 6mo nutshell) he hasn't been making the normal development steps he should be with his speech. They started talking about autism about a month ago and I freaked. We ended up seeking a second opinion through the Developmental Clinic. They confirmed the strong suspicion of Bennett being on the autism spectrum. They cannot place formal diagnosis was on children because they only do assessments. I have finally stepped back and opened my eyes and realized, he definitely has strong characteristics of ASD. So we are now starting the process of getting a "medical diagnosis" so that our insurance will help cover the costs of therapy that we will need. We are also starting the transition process out of the Early On speech therapy he is getting because he won't qualify for it after he turns 3. He will start in an early childhood special education classroom once he turns 3 in October (the school requirement). We have a great service coordinator that is helping get everything in line and answer all of our questions.

Honestly, we have no clue what the hell we are doing. Just taking it day by day and trying to do what's best for Bennett so he can learn and develop to the best of his ability. 

I'm scared and have so many questions and have questions that I haven't even thought of yet. It's kind of overwhelming. But we will be just fine! Bennett is so smart and so amazing! We have no doubt that he will do amazing things with the help he needs. We are so fortunate to also have a great support system of friends and family. I don't know what I would do without them! 

So here begins our journey and adventure. Let's do this!